Something special

Thursdays have become Turkish cooking 101 for me and my language helper. We talk a little, translate a little, she corrects me alot, and then class ends--but really begins after hours when we begin to cook dinner. This week we made a dried bean soup-ish dish and a famous salad called, 'Shepherd's salad'. I love learning to make this stuff. I've grown to love it, and it just makes me incredibly sentimental knowing I'll be able to take it home with me and share it with some of you one day. Or, when the day comes and I'm missing Turkey something bad, I'll pull out my çay (tea) glasses and sip some tea as I make some Turkish food to eat and reminisce. It's something special. I've grown to love these Thursday times so much. This Thursday, I got to try on some traditional clothes from her village! Yes, minus a few dangles, this is what women used to wear all the time--even when working in the fields--in her village!!! Can you just imagine? This woman has been such an encouraging presence in my life and her friendship is genuine to me in spite of and maybe because of all the patient moments we share working my feelings into words together in Turkish. She is something special. There's something about that time delay, between when a thought enters my head, the time it takes for me to think of the words to put that thought into verbal existence, and the moment I actually act on this in Turkish. It's humbling and it's growing Ephesians into me when Paul says, 'Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for edification according to the need of the moment so that it will give grace to those who hear.' Now, you can ask my loved ones and you'll know instantly, I'm not bragging...I am such a work in progress when it comes to this. But, He knows that and slowly, especially of late as I have begun to really speak, not just small talk, the time delay has grown and it's made me think about this verse, this week especially and I'm asking Him to help use this time when I'm practicing this 'think before you speak' practice more than really I ever have in life before, to grow me up. I want to speak love better. It's a work in progress, but I praise Him it's a work at all.
Speaking with this woman and having a real friendship with her is hope for me in this place. Sometimes, I feel like my language may be as good as it is going to get before I leave, like my friendships have plateaued and maybe they won't go deeper than they are now. Can they? Then in these frustrated moments, I meet with her and in a few hours with her, I'm reminded that if I open my mouth, He will fill it with His words, even in Turkish. It makes me feel a bit ecstatic that I can share my heart with this woman in her native language and in that moment we connect. It makes me feel alot of things all at once. It reminds me that if I can do this with her, I can do it in every one of my relationships. It makes me feel excited about ministry to come when I return where I can speak openly without studder and without apprehension about what the Lord is doing in my life in English. It makes me want to retain the humility I feel here always. It makes me want to tell Satan to back off, and remind myself what God is doing in the here and now in spite of how I 'feel' about my language. It makes me want to not be so hard on myself. It makes me want to press on and keep on speaking Truth unashamedly, in spite of my Turkish and in light of my Lord, into all my friendships and let Him do more than I can imagine in them because that's the kind of God I serve. It makes me want to just sit and be amazed at the God I serve. My life here is a testimony to His amazing grace, sovereignty,provision, power made strong in weakness, and love, among nameless other things. Being on this journey with Him is truly something special.